The company model is working beautifully. We've been rehearsing for about a month and a half, and so much about the group is going well: my dancers are fantastic to work with, the dances are growing with their own life force, and we are gathering/making opportunities to perform. Plus, we're all doing our best to live up to the expectations we set at the beginning. It's a dream.
Since I always find something to be anxious about, I find myself in the happy (?) situation of being nervous that this sweetness cannot last, and that when it sours it will be my fault. I imagine a future when I will have failed to be sufficiently compassionate, or bold, or creative, or communicative. I have unfortunate daydreams about it being the day of the show but having failed to produce anything worthwhile, or anything period. I talk about my excitement, and yet feel insecure when I'm hanging out with myself.
The wonderful, wonderful part of this is that I don't feel anxious in the studio. I love working with Myssi, Arianna, and Julia, and I feel so fortunate that they keep showing up for our company time. Really, I want to do right by them and their talents. Here's hoping that I can.
PS: They are performing my piece "Build Up" with six (6!) guest artists at the Your Move Dance Festival on Thursday, October 20th and Saturday, October 22nd. More info at the events page.